and studenthood is really
as good as life can ever get,
and that to me,
is disturbing news.
by the way i struggled through
tragic, tragic school life
i know i would spend a
good next half a century still
wading through shit and
struggling to make a living.
see in school
my teachers hated me for
my lack of intelligence and my inability
to present my work with
terrific handwriting.
they also hated me for not being
like other normal kids who
are able to boost their egos while
having casual chats with them,
because I am naturally clinically
un-sweet and, uninterested
in sharing my life with them,
however much they claim to be paid
to do so.
everytime i think of teachers
i think of their icy, cold stares
into the very core of my
stupid, incompetent self.
and altho there
are exceptions, i believe
that my absurdity have tempted
MotherTheresa-equivalents to
ditch their compassion for
frustration.
anw, you get the picture.
school isnt necessarily terrible,
but it is surely difficult.
its hard to imagine Work
as being any tougher.
i'm easy, really-
all i want in life is to be
employed, middle-class, be allowed
to play my Welmar, give my family and
dog(s) a good living and have humanity
stop destroying Mother Earth.
i would really love to be
a horribly ordinary adult.
i will be obedient and lawful,
i will pay my taxes and i will not
jaywalk.
i just want to be Normal.
but life will be hard,
i can see.
as a low-wage temp staff that
i currently am,
i have grown to understand that
i will dislike this
Corporate world
that requires me to
engage heavily in hypocrisy,
laugh at terrible humour that
my boss pulls,
and forces me to
overconsume paper as if trees
were limitless.
i know i will hate this life,
but i also know that
the challenge as an adult would be
to learn to be okay with these
by numbing myself with lots of
material things.
6:56 PM